Tough couple of weeks in the Barker-Wyatt household that's made training difficult as motivation has been low.  I've still managed to set small targets and get out there running and a bit of gym but my weight loss has halted.  This is going to get back on track today with some commitment to the task.  Its mind set and I have strong qualities that I need to tap into here and become more disciplined with myself and start looking after myself better.

The PROCESS is going to involve more running than I've done in training over the last 2 years combined with a bit of gym work.  The conditioning I can start to do more of at home and some early morning runs.  The weight will come off as a bi-product of good discipline and training regularly.

I've just started reading a book by Travis Macy called The Ultra Mindset so I'm hoping to get some good tips and strategies from this to implement in my training.   I guess my current battle is just about achieving some of my dream goals, I feel I've got to a point where I need something else in my training or psychology.  I feel I am capable of achieving some more great things and that I'm not beaten yet.  How do I draw on my emotions to dig in deeper?  How do I become a stronger phyisica runner and a more mental strong runner?

Consistency = Fitter + mentally stronger

Here we go again!

So I'm finally back at it after a summer of disappointing finishes starting with the Hardmoors 110 where I had to stop at 95 miles after getting timed out at Square corner just after Osmotherly and the Lakeland 100 where I only managed 33 miles before being timed out.  The simple fact is I am not good enough and have found temporary limitations to my running.  The question is, what am I going to do about it and can I learn from past experiences.

Last week I started the process of training again.  This began with weighing myself and having a minor shock or reality check whatever you want to call it but basically I haven't done myself any favours over the last 6 weeks of summer. Urrrgghhh!!!  This means I'm half a stone over my base level weight and a stone over where I want to be so weight is on my priority list to get lower.  In theory this should happen with training again and getting off the booze, AGAIN!!!

My entry is in for The Lakeland 100 next year and I will be entering the Hardmoors 160 again.  This means hard work over 8/9 months with doing more specific training and more mileage and losing the additional pounds to get where I want to be.  I have about 9 weeks till the Hardmoors 80 which will give me a good base before Christmas and a good focus for training over the next month or so.  It will also be at a good point to see how I'm fairing also to decide whether I need up my game or keep going and maintain.  Hill work, cardio, leg strength and weight!! These are my main focus points over the next 8 months.  Distance runs will also be very important but I have the 80 then the 55 so just need a couple of 30's in between.

Over the last week I have managed to get back out and running, which to be honest was a bit difficult as motivation was low and my mind wasn't really on it.  Once I got out there it felt great, I suddenly remembered why I liked it and that I definitely need to keep this up. My plan was to try and be consistent over the first couple of weeks just to rebuild some muscle memory and to not shock my body too much and end up injured straight away.  I not only soon realised how much I needed my running but I also quickly remembered how tough it was when you don't do it regular and like in my case have to carry too much excess weight.  Its time to stop the rot, and get back in the game!!!

The Hardmoors 160 is going to be really really tough and possibly out of my reach yet again but I'm going to give it my best shot even if it takes me another 2 or 3 attempts!

On the mend finally!  The last few days have taught me a lot when it comes to injuries.  Patience is a virtue remember, its all about process no matter what.  You've just got to believe you'll be ok and allow it to heal with time.  You can't rush it, you can't make it heal faster than it wants, youcan't cheat the process.  So I learnt that in future if I get a minor injury that I shouldn't just put it to one side and try to carry on, I need to listen to myself and remember past experience. The process will actually be quicker if you just give it a chance where as I've just been to hasty and its cost me.

I'm now looking forward to the Hardmoors 55, in fact I can't wait for the mini adventure and getting back out on the trails.  Initially I was wanting to really push myself in this race to get quicker over the 50 mile mark ready for the 110 and the Lakeland 100 but now I'm just content with actually getting the finish and being uninjured.  There's something to be said for healthy body-positive mind!  It will be a great test actually to see where I'm at and how the weight loss I've been working on will affect me.  Since Christmas I've dropped 3-4kg so half a stone which feels mega and I hope it tells in my long runs.  Using the shakes for lunch will be interesting too, as it will have made me less depend on a larger amount of food so it will be interesting how my body copes on route.

I keep thinking about why I keep doing this stuff now.  As really I've achieved all the goals I set out for and proved everything to myself that I needed to prove.  I'm just now mentally so much stronger because of my journey and all the good habits I've managed to re-train my body and mind to do are so ingrained that its actually just who I am now.  I don't want to change back, I like being me.  This culture really got hold of me, yes I love the runs and the adventures but its made me so much more.  Its made me a better all round person, more disciplined, more appreciative of other people and my environment, and I like looking after myself now.  The discipline for training go's much deeper than you think, it becomes part of you and everything you do.  Its created all these 'good habits' that make or are the ingredients to a better life not just running.  Its great!

Famous last words!!!

Clearly I spoke to soon, and clearly I was enjoying my training too much.  After I publish an update on my training on being positive, working hard, keeping it relative, what happens..... I pull my hamstring!!!! AAArrrrggghhhh!!

Over the last few weeks my right leg hasn't been great to be fair but I've persisted and tried to keep it to a minimum so not overloading it.  I was actually feeling good, bloody typical hey!  My gym work was paying off and my weight was improving, slowly coming off and making me feel good about my training.  I started with a niggle in my hamstring a few weeks back which in reflection is the point I should have backed off completely and taken a break, but no I thought I knew best and carried on hoping I could assist in the recovery by doing minimal amounts on it but hopefully stretching it out.  I have a regular massage each week where we have focused mainly on the hamstring to help with recovery and its been doing the trick.  Stupidly I thought I was ok to play in a squash match but unfortunately during which I felt my hammie twang!  My self diagnosis was it was a massive tear but only a strain.  I had a couple of days of discomfort but then the recovery process began and its improved each day.  The worrying thing is, it actually feels better now than just before it went.  So maybe it needed something to happen.  I don't recommend this as a recovery method ha ha, I think a break from what you do and a rest period is probably the best course of action.

So with 4 weeks to go my confidence has take a bit of a hit but I'm trying to use a positive mind set about the upcoming events and how I want to to do in them.  I was hoping to really push myself in the Hardmoors 55 but depending on how the next few weeks go it might be just a take it easy run out and save myself for the 110 end of May.

It was interesting at the weekend when Sarah came back from her run on the moors.  It reminded me of why running and especially trail running is so good for the soul.  Sarah's mood and persona seemed much more uplifted, up beat and positive.  I could tell she'd had a great experience because she couldn't wait to tell me about the new route and how beautiful it was.  Then she kept telling me of all her plans and ideas for what she was wanting to try and do from now on.  Its brilliant seeing the transformation in someone's outlook and spirit in such a short period of time.

How am I going to get ready for the Hardmoors 55 now.  Well I want this week to be like a re-introduction back to training, I have a massage tomorrow that will be a good starting place I think.  Then next week I want to be out on the trails for a couple of steadish runs.

Great few weeks getting some base level training in until last Monday when in all honesty and in reflection I over did it.  I've been putting in some good solid sessions in the gym recently and I've been putting the work in outside by doing my hill reps and a bit of speed work.  So a slight set back last Monday when I was doing some extra lunges between lessons and after I'd already my gym session.  I was aiming for a 100 and I done two lots of 30 then something just twanged in my hip flexor area and I knew straight away I'd done something.  It wasn't a major injury but its halted the good work.  I've slowly tried to stretch it and get back to training but I can still feel it and daren't push my luck so whilst doing light exercise and stretching in that muscle group I'm trying to work other areas harder.

I'm starting to get excited about the Hardmoors 55 challenge and then the 110, its great I'm buzzing and loving doing the training.  I just want to be able to work hard in my training so I can give it my best shot on race day.  Positivity is key!!!  Finding little positives in everything you do and then believing in it.  I believe in myself and my inner strengths, and now I need them to make me train smart to achieve my goals.  Small targets big goals remember.

I/m really looking forward to getting out on the trails hopefully this week doing a bit of a recce but more importantly getting back to my hill work so I'll be concentrating not only on distance but to work hard over the hills to prepare for the 55.

I love training when its like it has been for the past few weeks.  My motivation is sky high and I'm bubbling over with enthusiasm for the process of achieving my goals.  My desire to complete the Hardmoors 160 next and to go on to achieve equally as daunting challenges grows and grows.  I'm not in it to be elite, I just want to be able to complete the challenges and do these extraordinary things.  My main focus at the moment is base level fitness (so a good level of gym conditioning work) and regular varying runs.  I'm incorporating hill training straight away this time as I want to monitor the progress over a longer period of time as this is an area I want to get stronger at.

The challenges haven't changed since I started doing this kind of endurance races its just I realise that for me to achieve more and better I have to improve me.  To improve ones self is being able to recognise strengths and weakness, and work on strengths by continuing the development and to build on the weaknesses.  Also trying different methods of training and focusing on different aspects helps.  More recce runs of the sections in the race where I know I will initially struggle plus training over the ground where the race is will help with confidence on the day.

One of the keys to success in these events for me personally is your team.  In my case, my amazing partner Sarah.  Sarah has been with me on a few long races now and she has now become an essential part of my long ultra runs.  I am able to relax in the knowledge that she's at the next rendezvous knowing what I need. Although I've been doing all this for a few years now I still feel I have a lot to learn not just about the running but about myself and what it takes to get the best out of my body.

Never stop trying to learn more!

I love it when a plan comes together!

This must be what Hannibal in the A-Team felt like when he started forming a plan.  If you remember, not so long ago I DNF'd  in the Hardmoors 160.  Well it now doesn't seem so far off my next attempt.  Yes its next year in fact about 18 months, but I feel like I'm planning for it now.  I am currently training for the Hardmoors 55 in March with a plan of trying to get a fast time (for me) of around 13-14 hours so that I can take that forward to the Hardmoors 110.  The plan for the 110 is to really push myself on the first half from Filey to Saltburn which is where I need to gain some confidence as this is where I came unstuck last May.

My training for the 55 and 110 is going to include speed work, hill training, and mileage.  This should put me in good stead for the Lakeland 100.  I need to get a few recce's done for the later part of the LL100 which will be the night section.  I really want to finish this race and tick it off as its one of the big races on my 'to do' list.

The summer will be used as my chance to go and do some training runs on the 160 route, and again this will predominantly the first section from Sutton Bank to Helmsley, then Helmsley to the Cleveland Way, then Ravenscar to Saltburn.  If I can get some confidence here and work on where I need to push harder and be able to do it in a good time I can then go in to the 160 feeling good.

So, what will I do for the speed work.  I intend to use short out and back routes around where I live starting with 2 miles and building upwards to 10 really trying to run at a pace where I will literally burn out.  Hill work I am trying to use the same Hill in a consistent training format as in this time I did 4 and a bit miles but 4 times up the hill.  So each time I do the session which in theory I want to do it once a week, I will try to increase the hill reps by 1 each time. So finally for the mileage I intend to increase my overall weekly distance to begin with its a 10 week plan and it will progress from there depending on the dates of races.  I don't want to overdo the mileage but I do want to increase it compared to what I've done so far.  If I combine it with my recce's then that should cover it.  These will be combined with my gym work with Jake trying to keep improving my strength and conditioning.

That's the plan anyway!

I'm sure it will change ha ha