Wow that first heat session hit me hard.  At first I thought I was unaffected and good to go, but once I'd driven home it started!  Just a gradual tiring feeling, exhausted and lethargic.  I also apart from the obvious dehydrated feeling I started feeling hungry constantly, nothing seemed to satisfy.  The tough bit was yet to come I had to go back to work.  Exhausted .com!

Yesterday I was back to normal maybe slightly jaded but ok, if anything I was just suffering from sitting on the bike for 90 minutes.  Yes, you guessed it I was walking like John Wayne initially ha ha!  This has been a great period of the training as everyone is posting their sessions on the facebook group and we're all passing on tips and useful bits of info.  Great to exchange experiences too, for most this is all new so quite exciting.

Wednesday came, this time I wanted to be more prepared.  I wanted to have eaten well the previous night and had a good nights sleep.  My intention was to be up early and out in plenty of time so that I would get there in good time for the 9.30 start.  This all happened pretty much how I wanted, I was there just 5 mins early but in good time to be ready for my next session. More prepared, more eager and ready to test my foot.  This time I wanted to use the treadmill, I had my race trainers, socks and gaiters on and possible race shirt and MdS hat. I filled two bottles with 600 mils of electrolyte drink and had them ready, the treadmill started and off I went.  It seemed much more difficult than when I was on the bike, I seemed to be sweating more but this was apparently because last time I was more directly in front of the fans where as this time I was slightly to the side.

A totally different experience this time compared to Monday.  It took longer to get my core temp nearly an hour and we took it too 39 this time.  My heart rate was averaging at 165 bpm, I was working at level 6 on the treadmill and with an incline of 6 to start with but once the core temp was up we lowered it.  90 minutes and almost 10k done, 2.2 litres or kg's lost and 1.2 litres drank during the course of the exercise which was an SIS electrolyte drink.  I ended up averaging 100mls every 5 mins but I must have been taking less than that before.  After the first 45 mins drinking every 5 mins but not regulating it, then afterwards monitoring how much I wanted to have I now have a clear indication of how much I need to have in that 5 min period and its about 125ml.  So the plan on Monday is to try and nail this side to the training.  I will be working much harder as will have my pack on.  I felt exhausted again afterwards but like before not straight away it was a gradual effect.  I came out of the chamber slightly dizzy but I think that was only because of the motion of the treadmill.

Its hot, damn hot!

Hells kitchen!

The burners were on, it was an oven for people I kid you not!  After arriving at Leeds Beckett Uni and having my first mini adventure of parking then finding the Worseley Building, I met Matt who I'd been talking previously with on the facebook group and went over to the lab where then met Mark who was to lead the session.  I got kitted up, drink and towel at the ready, then Mark need to make a few notes on weight, height and fitness level.  I just said extreme lol!  I made way to this cupboard sized room, that had a little window for onlookers to obvious the current victims, like a port hole on a boat.  The door by which we entered was like an industrial sized freezer door, my initial reaction was that I wasn't getting out of there in a hurry so its game face time.  There it was my home for the next 90 minuets, the bike, the machine that would prove to be a greater hinderance than my damn foot.  So to describe the room, just big enough for two treadmills side to side (and bike inbetween fitted in just for me) then two of the biggest fans blasting out hot air about a meter in front of you.  These just made me think of the jets from a 747 blasting you to bits.   Then we had a few cables dangling from the ceiling, one was plugged into my ear to monitor my core temperature and the other was attached to my other ear to monitor my heart rate.  I was given a very fetching grey head band to put on to hold the ear pieces in place, it was ok to start with but became a little annoying after a while.  On the bike I sat, ear plugs and my yellow MdS cap on ready for off.  There were a couple of monitors in front of us on a chair, core temperature and a stopwatch both became a torturous visual hinderance  but interesting watching.

Ticking clocks!   The minutes seem to be slipping through my fingers like sand.  Every second  have another thought, should I take this should I take that, do I need more food could I take less food, its a nightmare.  I think it will be better next week when I just make that final decision and draw the line and say that's it, nothing more nothing less whatever it is then it is.

Quite an interesting few days actually.  I've been trying to maintain my sauna usage and I think its paid off I'll explain why in a minute.  So swimming and pool running, my new pool trainers/shoes/slippers not really sure what you call them but they make a difference in the pool with grip but also they stop your feet from getting shredded.  I have also managed more biking but have eased off with this slightly after Rory Colemans advice to do very little and rest the foot.  Its so hard!

Sunday was great, I decided it was time to test my foot slightly with out going overboard but to do enough in a safe enough environment to be able to stop as when I needed to.  So pack on, legionnaires hat and glasses and earphones in, off I trot around the field next to the tennis club which was about a 3rd of a mile.

I felt good so every now and again I pushed the pace but had reel myself back in after short bursts as I felt the odd twinge but what was important was that I was learning how to manage it.  Part of the rehabilitation process relys on you manage your individual body.  Each persons knows what they can and can't manage, we all try to protect injurys that's natural the body will do this wether you want to or not, to override this basic human instinct is an incredibly tough but doable task.  There I am walking round the field looking like something that's just landed from outer space and waving to all the people playing tennis who just stop mid rally to gaupe at the nutter in the field lol!  I managed 2 miles which was what I was planning there or there abouts, my foot wasn't hurting but I knew I'd done enough i'd stretched it and worked it a little and didn't need to push it any further.  I'd also had time with my pack which I have worried about not doing enough as it will be your lower back that feels the strain initial so prepare by doing.  Doing what your going to do, practice and preparation!  Once I had taken the straight jacket off (the pack) and dumped it in the car, I headed off for the pool, training wasn't over yet.

I'd done 2 miles outside with my pack on and most of the kit I was going to have whilst on the MdS, next job was a 1 mile pool run/power walk.  New pool shoes on, next to the window with the sun beating down and we're off.  Nothing exciting, just up and down 60 odd times with numerous slips and slides like bambi on ice but all good you just got to do it.  From the pool straight into the sauna trying to last a good 20 mins with the occasional step ups to replicate exercising in the heat with heart rate up.  Its tough to make yourself do these things as individually they are not that difficult its just a matter of doing it and experiencing the feeling and the effects on the body to help you prepare.

No surprises!

Really managed to get some good training in the last few days so this renewed confidence is lasting which is great.  Everyone keeps asking me if I'm nervous, and slightly worryingly I'm actually not.  Excited yes, keen to start and get on with it yes, hoping I haven't forgotten anything or overlooked anything definitely!

This morning I took my training to a whole new level.  I first went in the pool swam approximately 10 lengths then did 10 power walking which was great, I just tried to protect my foot which is all I do at the moment but it was starting to cause a slight ache from the ankle up the shin, not good!  So I progressed to the sauna where I am trying to increase the amount of time I am spending in there each visit and more often.  This time though I had a new trick up my sleeve, so armed with my water bottle off I marched, to the OVEN!!!  So after reading about one of the other competitors on the facebook MdS forum page doing step ups in the sauna I thought I could have a go it seemed like a reasonable way to introduce heat acclimatisation whilst exercising.  Apart from the odd interruption from the odd inconsiderate sole wanting to just sit in the sauna I managed three bursts of effort involving 20 step ups alternating my leading foot and yes protecting my toes on my left foot.  It went well, and I was dead pleased I was still doing something worthwhile and contributing to my task.  Up and down the bottom step, easy, until I realised my head was burning as was so close to the ceiling therefore the hottest part.  Each time I sat back down to rest someone came in which was unbelievable timing but must have seemed weird as my heart rate was high and I was probably looking slightly out of breath h ha!

Round two tomorrow!

Only 'I can, I will!'

I now have a renewed sense of confidence.  Not sure why, not sure how, but I now definitely have the belief that I will be all good to go on the 9th of April.  Its not going to be pretty but I know myself and what I can do, all I am there to do now is complete the course in the required time.  Any ideas of getting my best placement is now out the window, it was never going to be a world record but it would have been nice to see what my best is.  Now I am just happy to be there and hopefully push myself to finish it. 

I have been able to increase my limited training to make sure my legs are going to be ready for the trauma that they will face my feet are going to have to take a hit for the team which I am not looking forward to.  I'm hoping all the upper body work that I have done will be enough and my back doesn't get too painful too early on.

Yesterday I made a decision to get out for a minimal walk with pack and some kit on.  The sun was shining and I felt good.  I managed about 4.5 miles looking like something from Dads Army lol! My foot coped ok, but was still slightly sore but once back at the house I treated it with ice etc and it was fine again later on.

So here I am in some of my kit, this was to get a feel for the hat and glasses really.  Also testing where the bottles are and how the small bags on the belt fitted and there accessibility.  It was good to get out, physically just to get the extra fitness plus carrying the pack but also mentally as this settled some anxiety about not being ready.

Its a frustrating time at the moment.  I am recovering and confident I will be ok for the Marathon de Sables but I am desperate to get training.  Its only in times like these that I realise how much I depend on my training and that physical side to my life.  I may not be an elite athlete, lean and super fast but I am definitely addicted to my training and running.  No doubt about it, I just want to get out there and enjoy some runs whether trails, hills or just some basic road running at the moment.  Its this frustration that breaking me more than the knowledge that after 4 days in the desert I am going to be a broken man with a good 40 miles still to go.  My mental training is kicking in now, 'what do you do for this' I hear you say.  Well for me its about visualising each sections success, breaking it down into small bite size chunks, managing my fears but focusing on my strengths and dreams and why I am there.  I will also be drawing on all my experiences from the past few years, building up to this event, thinking of all the tough endurance races I have done and endured and learnt from.  I am not there on a whim I am there because I have earned the right, I have followed the path that I set out 2 years ago to get here I am not concerned about the last months lack of training.  I have this in my legs, I can do this mentally in my head, and I can do this with heart!!

Belief is one of our strongest attributes do not underestimate someone who believes they can do something.  Don't forget, anything is possible!

Yes its a been a while sorry just didn't want to bore anyone with repeating myself.  The good news is my foot seems to be healing, its a slow process but it is definitely getting better.  On Tuesday I had what I am calling my major panic day, my melt down, my moment of self doubt, my almost breaking point.  This is when everything has become too much and you think your at the end of the road, run out of time, its not achievable.  Well since I run endurance Ultra marathons I have certain qualities that mean when this point arrives I deal with it, find a solution and move on.  It is not in my nature to quit, to believe that I can't do something till I can't actually do it.  My strength of mind and character is what will get me to that start line and then consequently will get me to the finish line.  It may not be pretty but I will be there.  As per normal I have reasoned it in my head the purpose of the exercise now is to learn.  'Learn, learn what and for what?' I hear you say.  Well I can't leave it here can I, you can't have this great experience all these new things and then not do anything with it can you lol!

My biggest issue with the way my training has petered out due to injury, is that I have been unable to complete my training the way I had planned it in my head.  There was certain things I really wanted to do and have a go at that now it would be silly to attempt as would probably just cause a reaction and re-injure myself before the big start.  I want to be on that start line all excited and giddy like everyone else will be before the reality kicks in and the pain.  What I don't want is to begin feeling pain, nervous to step on my foot, fear of major injury and eventually being pulled from the race.  I want to be there at the end!

So, what I am going to do between now an the off day.  After conversations with Steve Dietrich and Rory Coleman I have belief that I will make the start, I also know not to run or cause further damage to my foot, and now I also need to buy another pair of blinking trainers! Aaarrrggghhhh!  I am ditching the Scotts for the race not forever as loved them but taking Rory's advice and going for the Brooks Ghost's or Adrenalines as they have a wide 4E option that will help me.  I am also considering at this late stage to acquire some running poles this is last as I have run out of money now!

Keep positive......find positives............never give up!

March the 8th and now in full on panic mode!  Not through fear of my challenge ahead as this still lies in the unknown, you know it will be hard, you know it will hurt, you know you will face many challenges along the way that are going to test to your ultimate.  No, I now have my greatest fear slowly creeping up on me, being injured on the start line!  This is my worst fear!  I have spent just over two years really gearing up for this building my running ability, building my distances, learning the lessons along the way and training and training and training.  My foot is mending but it is such a slow process and with my job it doesn't help.  It will be ok for the start but I won't have much time to make it stronger so inevitably it is likely to strain again on the first day.  So my tactical planning and strategy will now be very important.  I still don't intend to walk the whole thing, this has been my goal from the start so I will be running as much as I can.. It might be though that I am very steady on the first couple of days so as not to aggrevate it too much before the long day which is more than likely going to wreck it completey.  If I can get through that long day and still hobble a reasonable walk I will be able to complete it.  Its a mind game from now, training is as good as finished its just a matter of keeping fit, eating well and being prepared!

Last boy scout!